And the radio man says...

Copyright Ian Shane

17 January 2010

It’s Time To Move On, Baltimore


There is nothing but hate in the town of Baltimore. Even after 26 years, the bile from the fan base continues. When the name "Bob Irsay" is uttered, the bad memories come rushing out as if the Mayflower trucks had pulled out just yesterday. Now that the Colts have beaten the Ravens 20-3 in the divisional playoff game, I doubt that the anger will go away.

In an column in the Baltimore Sun titled "Ravens' Victory Would Be Sweet for Fans, Franchise on Several Levels" written by the aptly named Peter Schmuck, the ghosts of football franchises past are referred to again, and the pain and agony of losing a pretty bad football team who wouldn't win a playoff game for another 11 years is highlighted. Schmuck tells tales about how a Ravens victory would have been the second biggest win in franchise history, first of course being the Super Bowl win 9 years ago. Yes, Baltimore was the home of the Vince Lombardi Trophy before Indianapolis.

One fan replied in prose…
Winning this game will dim that fateful night, when that pig Irsay stole our Colts with out giving us a chance to fight.
Knock that horseshoe off their helmets and compare them no more, to the legend of Johnny U, Berry and Moore.
Our team is ready to hit and tackle, a win would bust that Indy shackle.
The Super Bowl would be nice and great to win, but beating the Indy colts tonight would give it to Irsay, right on the chin.
I guess that fan didn't hear that Bob Irsay has been dead for 14 years.

So I have a few things that I would like to request. In the future when these two teams meet in the playoffs, could we please stop fighting the battle of who could care less.

To football fans in Baltimore: It's been 26 years. Perhaps, you should move on.

To ESPN and the sensational media: Every time the Colts and Ravens play, stop showing the Mayflower Trucks.

To the people who insist on bringing this up every single time these two teams play: Tell the whole story.
  • The Colts have had a vagabond history. Originally the Dayton Triangles, the team lifted anchor and moved to New York and became the Brooklyn Dodgers in 1930. The team then changed the name to the Brooklyn Tigers. The next year, the Tigers merged with the Boston Yankees. In 1949 the Boston Yankees moved to New York to become the New York Yanks. The team moved again in 1952, this time to Dallas, and became the original Dallas Texans. The Texans moved to Baltimore in 1953, and changed the name to the Colts. So if you're keeping score at home, that's six relocations in the team's 80 years.
  • The Colts had been threatening to relocate as early as 1971 if they didn't get a new stadium.
  • Memorial Stadium "featured" non backed bleachers…in the 1980s.
  • Attendance had been dropping at Memorial Stadium steadily for 7 years.
  • Baltimore got the Ravens in the same manner Indy got the Colts. Nobody seemed to mind then.
So to the huddled masses in the greater Baltimore area, just stop talking about it. Stop officially referring to the Colts as "The Professional Football Franchise from Indianapolis." Get off your high horse (yes, every pun intended). The people of Cleveland have forgotten that your Ravens are nothing more than the Browns in purple. In fact, both sports franchises in Baltimore originated in other cities (the Baltimore Orioles were once the St. Louis Browns…ironically enough).

Just stop the noise.

14 January 2010

The Mix CD Axiom


There have been many guidelines posted on the internet on the dos and don'ts for making a Mix Tape/CD. Some of these are good tips, but most of these lack a certain touch. This humble post is not exactly the Marquees of Queensbury Rules of making mix CDs, but it can make the difference between a good mix, and a classic playlist (not to brag, but I have put together some awesome CDs in the past). Here is a list of rules that I have come up with over the years.

Article One: The Purpose of the Mix
You need to figure out why you are putting together the mix. Is this something you're putting together to impress a girl? Are you trying to expand somebody's musical horizons? What feeling are you trying to convey? Once you have figured this part out, you need to come up with some appropriate songs.

Article Two: Know Thy Listener
You have to remember, if the mix is for someone else, they must like the music. Period. If not, your intended purpose will not be realized. This is where a lot of people go off the rails. The tendency is to load it up with songs that you like. While it's true that you need to have at least an appreciation for what's included, you have to ask the question, "will the person listening like this". This requires a lot of recon. When talking about music, listen for what that person likes, and go from there. If you're listening to a radio station or another CD, judge the other person's response to a certain song. You don't have to make this a compilation of someone's favorite songs, but use noted favorites to sketch the playlist. If your target likes Talking Heads, then they may like Bell X1.

An 80 minute CD holds anywhere between 17-22 songs, so you are going to have to come up with 25-30 songs as a candidate list. Once you have the list, you must rank the songs for impact. There should be 5 or 6 cornerstone songs that have the highest ranking. These are the best songs in the list, and they should contain the heart of your motive. The others are filler songs (not to say that these are throw away songs, but ones that establish the ebb and flow of the mix). Once you have the nominees…

Article Three: Playlist Structure
To make a great mix, one must apply the Hornby Law of Playlist Structure. In the Nick Hornby novel High Fidelity, the story's protagonist, Rob Gordon states that you have to start of the Mix Tape (it was written in the 90s after all), you must start off with a great song, and then kick it up a notch. After the second or third song, you have to cool it off to prevent burnout. This is the same strategy that a distance runner would employ during the race. You need to get off to a good start, but you need to slow down at some point, or else you'll find the finish line. It sounds silly, but it's true. So your skeleton for an 18 song playlist should look like this…

Opening Track: A Corner Stone Song. This one should be a familiar song for the listener. For example, if one of your goals is to turn somebody on to the Neko Case song "People Got a Lot of Nerve", don't lead off with Neko Case. Put something that the person will know, and most likely enjoy. The purpose of this song is get your listener's attention. If you lead off with a song that your audience won't like, then your weeks of work may end in 7 seconds. Make sure that the song or artist is well known, but not overly popular. You run the risk of boring your listener if your opener isn't unique enough. If you must insist on opening with a U2 song (which I would NEVER recommend), don't make it "Vertigo" or "Even Better than the Real Thing". Use something like "When Love Comes to Town" or their version of "All Along the Watchtower"

Song 2: Another Corner Stone Song. I usually like to reserve the strongest song of the CD for this position. In many cases, it's the song I've designed the mix around, although that song may be moved to another place because of the ebb and flow. This song need not be upbeat, but have some sort of power behind it. Song 2 should not be a ballad, unless it's for someone you're already dating.

Song 3: A Cornerstone. This song should serve as the transition into the Filler Songs.

Song 4-15: Filler Songs (see Article Four for expanded coverage)

Song 16: The Transition Cornerstone Song. This is the lead in to the grand finale.

Song 17: This should be a song much like the opening track. One of the stronger songs, but specifically
geared to set up the last song.

The Closer: The Signature Song. This is the last chance to impress your listener. This is the no holds barred song. Whatever you want to say in a mix CD, this is where you do it. Every track leads up to this song. Example: Years ago, I closed a mix for a girl with the song "Better Be Home Soon" by Crowded House. Not only does this song beg to be at the end of any CD, the underlining theme was "please figure out what you want, because I'm planning to move on soon" (which eventually I did).

Article Four: The Fillers
Remember that the term Filler is used because of a lack of a better term. Think of these as the middle relievers of your playlist. It still needs to be solid in order to make it a great CD. The last thing that you want to do is to lose the listener's attention. Filler songs should maintain the same feeling that the cornerstone songs have.

Article Five: Transitions and Sequence
While it's true that you want your cornerstone songs to flow together, it is especially critical that your fillers transition well. If you are going to put a song that is unfamiliar to the listener, place it next to a song that has a similar sound. For example, D really likes Landon Pigg's "Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop". Knowing this, I decided to add Nick Drake's "Place to Be" right after Landon for the mix CD Chevelure. They both are slower acoustic guitar centric songs, and just flow together. Resist the urge to go directly from a slow song to a hard upbeat song. Bridge that gap.

Do not jolt the listener by abutting two vastly different songs back to back. Never play "Black Friday Rule" by Flogging Molly back to back with "Caravan" by Van Morrison. I don't care if they are both Irish, those two songs don't belong together.

Another transition strategy is to group songs written by the same artist. It's no secret that I am a huge Tom Waits fan, and I have on more than one occasion put several songs written by Waits together.

It is also fun to have common bonds link songs together. Again, on several occasions, I have put Diana Krall back to back with Elvis Costello (or as she calls him, her husband).

Article Six: Other Rules and Guidelines
Never use the same artist twice in the same CD. You may also not use a variation of the same artist on the same disc. For example, you may not use "Who Are You" by the Who and "Slit Skirts" by Pete Townshend in the same playlist.

Although it is not a concrete rule, you should not use the same cornerstone song for different mixes.

Titles should be clever, and should have something to do with the theme of the mix. If not, it should at least be an inside joke with the person for whom you have made the disc.

Never repeat the name of a mix.

Never reveal the contents of the playlist to the target person until that have listened to the entire CD. If the intended listener recognizes a song before listening to the whole thing, the temptation will be for that person to skip ahead to that song.

Always write liner notes to the CD. Mark the significance of certain songs, or write why you chose to make the mix.

Never make a mix shorter than 72 minutes. It's just a waste of space.

04 January 2010

Anthology X1 - The Demon Barber of Seville

This is the 11th edition of the “Anthology Series” (as described in the December 26th blog entry). The original series (Anthologies 1-6, “From DNA to 26”) was completed in May 2000. Since then, a new chapter has been added every two years.

“Anthology X1 – The Demon Barber of Seville” is the music that has been the backdrop and inspiration to my life from 2008-2009.

Here are some of the songs that are missing…

Canon in D – Sharp Jimmy and the Dammit Five
Matter of Time – Los Lobos and Elvis Costello
Jump Into the Fire – Harry Nilsson
The Rainbow Connection – Willie Nelson
Thanksgiving – Poi Dog Pondering
Norwegian Wood – Jeremy Messersmith & Zach Coulter