This is a blog about my passions, including (but not limited to) music, writing, Vegas, poker, my homeland Indiana (mostly sports), and any little thing that strikes my fancy. I publish new posts at 11:20 (Central) on Tuesdays and Thursdays with an occasional Saturday post. I do, however, reserve the right to add a big story as it happens.
It’s been the talk (or more to the point, the main complaint) of the World Cup. I’m of course talking about the vuvuzela. Who knew that an eight dollar hunk of plastic could tick off so many people?
While it has become the most reviled noise since Yoko Ono started making albums, I have grown to love the vuvuzela. If I owned an iPhone, I would have already purchased the vuvuzela app. Complain if you must, but I think it makes the matches more exciting and it gives the fans a chance to be a part of the game. Plus, I just like the noise.
Allow me to make a modest proposal. Bring the vuvuzela to American Football.
Really.
Why not? If the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim can use the annoying “Thundersticks”, I think we can put up with the sound of bees for 16 weeks a year. However, I’m not suggesting that the horns should be present in all 31 stadiums. There should be only one team to adopt it. I have constructed a rubric that will help find the perfect team.
1. No Indoor Stadiums
This one is a no brainer. In an outdoor stadium, the decibel levels can reach 127 decibels. If you put this in an indoor stadium, the noise would become even more unbearable.
Eliminated: Indy, Houston, Minnesota*, Detroit, New Orleans, Atlanta, Arizona, St. Louis and Seattle
2. No Cold Weather Teams
Honestly, the sound of bees sounds out of place in Buffalo…in December. The vuvuzela is obviously meant to be used in a warmer climate.
Eliminated: The entire AFC North, the Hatriots, both New York teams, Buffalo, Kansas City, Denver, Green Bay, Chicago, Philadelphia and Washington
3. Diverse and Open Population
Let’s face it, the vuvuzela is an international item and should be used in a place that’s not so…oh, what’s the word…WASPy.
Eliminated: Tennessee, Oakland, Carolina and Dallas
4. Known for its Defense
In American Football, when is the crowd the loudest? When the home team is on defense. Since the vuvuzela makes things exciting, it should only be use when there is something about which to get excited. Teams like the 49ers are long associated with the “West Coast Offense”, not its stellar defense.
Eliminated: Jacksonville, San Francisco and Miami
This leaves two teams left; San Diego and Tampa Bay. Both locations fit the above four criteria. However, there can be only one. So to come up with the team I am making my own tie breaker.
5. It Can’t Be Direct Competition Against My Team
I’m a Colts Fan. I can’t risk another AFC team having home field in the playoffs and using the vuvuzela against my boys in blue.
Eliminated: San Diego
Congratulations, Tampa Bay, you have a new tradition. To the Glazer brothers and general manager Mark Dominik; please buy 75,000 of these and hand them out during the home opener at Raymond James Stadium.
*May be reconsidered when the Vikings relocate to Los Angeles.
It's no secret that I am a huge Colts fan. This is not a recent development that started when some guy named Peyton came to town 12 seasons ago. I date back to the Jack Trudeau/Ron Meyer era. Sure, I was a fan of other teams in the past as well. To be fair, I was 11 when the Colts played their first game in the venue formally known as the Hoosier Dome (to this day, I refuse to call it by its corporate name, as the same year the Radio Company of America gave the Circle City a huge check for naming rights was the same year they closed the RCA/Thompson plant in Bloomington because of budgetary reasons. Nice, isn't it). Plus, if I wanted to root for a team in January, it couldn't be the Colts (for a long time, I was a Dolphin fan, too). With the Pacers in state, I was convinced that Indy would never be the home of a professional sports champion (The ABA era doesn't count). Sure, every now and then, the Colts would have a winning season, but nothing consistent.
I really started to get into the Colts in 1995. I was working promotions at WGBF, and our radio station had done some charity work with Colt Tight End Ken Dilger (who is also a Southern Indiana native). That season, I went to my first Colt game with my brother (Indy is a good three hour drive from Evansville). They lost to the San Diego Chargers, a defeat that would be avenged in the AFC playoffs. The Colts made it to the AFC Championship game that year, and got screwed out of making the Super Bowl, thanks to Kordell Stewart's illegal TD catch before halftime, and the pass interference no call in the end zone on the last play. I'm still convinced that the Colts would have beaten the Dallas Cowboys that year for the Lombardi Trophy—a theory that was bolstered by the Colts beating the Cowboys AT DALLAS 25-24 in week 3 of the next season.
When I moved to Bloomington, I was able to watch the Colts every Sunday, and my love of the boys in blue grew. I hung with them during the Lindy Infante seasons, and then hoped they got the 1998 draft right. Indy picked Peyton Manning, and the rest was history. The Colts started to build a juggernaut that would eventually break the record for franchise victories in a decade. It was a magical time.
I'd like to take a little credit for the hiring of Tony Dungy. I was working nights at WTTS after Dungy was unjustly fired in Tampa. Knowing that Indy was looking for a new head coach and that Colts owner Jim Irsay listened to our station, I repeatedly stated on the air that Dungy would make the Colts a contender. A month later, Dungy was hired. Coincident? I would have asked for confirmation of my influence during my bizarre interview with Irsay later that off-season, but his 15 minute answer of the question "How are you, Jim?" took us to commercial break.
Being a Colts fan is advanced fandom. You have to endure drafting Chris Chandler and Jeff George, and the consistent pantsing by the New England Hatriots. You have to hear Mel Kiper Jr. tell the world that the Colts don't understand what the draft is all about, and that's why they'll be a bad team for a very long time. You had to watch home games on a field that looked like pool felt in the Mini-Me version of Minneapolis's Metro Dome. Every Dan Marino milestone that is perfectly preserved on NFL films was captured in Indy. Indianapolis endured threats of nuclear obliteration by the great city of Baltimore (even after they stole the Browns from Cleveland).
All of it was worth it three years ago. A Super Bowl Championship. Hot damn.
There have many storylines that have popped out in the time since the conference championship games. However, for as ridiculous as some of these are, here are some subplots that haven't surface. Why the hell not, there are two weeks and 24 hour coverage. And I'd be willing to bet, if Dwight Freeney was healthy, some may have come up.
The Lincoln Had A Secretary Named Kennedy Subplot: Manning is from New Orleans, Breese play college ball in Indiana.
The What Could Have Been Subplot: Manning almost left Tennessee after his junior year to enter the draft, and was projected to be the number one pick overall. The team who had the first pick that year? New Orleans. With Manning deciding to finish his colligate career, The Saints instead drafted Florida QB Danny Wuerffel.
The Should Have Been Bowl Subplot: The last time the Colts played in the Super Bowl three years ago, also in Miami, they faced the Bears. The Bears beat the Saints in the NFC Championship Game.
The Jim Mora Subplot: The two greatest coach's meltdowns in the history of the NFL were perpetrated by Jim Mora. One when he was the coach of the Colts, and the other when he was the coach of the Saints.
The Dome Sweet Done Subplot: This is the first time in the history of the Super Bowl that both teams that play their home games in an indoor stadium are facing off in the Super Bowl.
The You Really Should Forget Your First Time Subplot: Record of first time Super Bowl teams in the championship game (not including first time teams playing another first time team): 4-12. The winners were the Pittsburgh Steelers (SB IX against Minnesota), New York Giants (SB XXI against Denver), Baltimore Ravens (SB XXV against the Giants), Tampa Bay Buccaneers (SB XXXVII against Oakland). The losers were the Minnesota Vikings (SB IV against the Chiefs), Dallas Cowboys (SB V against the Colts), Denver Broncos (SB XII against Dallas), LA Rams (SB XIV against Pittsburgh), Philadelphia Eagles (SB XV against Oakland), Buffalo Bills (SB XXV against the Giants), San Diego Chargers (SB XXIX against San Francisco), Atlanta Falcons (SB XXXIII against Denver), Tennessee Titans (SB XXXIV against the Rams), Carolina Panthers (SB XXXVIII against the Hatriots), Seattle Seahawks (SB XL against Pittsburgh), and the Arizona Cardinals (SB XLIII against Pittsburgh). The Saints play in their first ever Super Bowl.
The Miami Colts Subplot: The Colts have made the Super Bowl four times. Each time, the game was in Miami. Wearing the white unis, the Colts are 2-0. Wearing the blue uniforms, they are 0-1. The Colts wear blue Sunday.
The Indianapolis Saints Subplot: Before Robert Irsay moved the Colts to the Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis real estate developer Bob Welch tried to buy the New Orleans Saints from John Mecom in order to relocate them to Indy. Mecom instead sold the team to Tom Benson, and kept the team in New Orleans.
All this being said, I like the odds for my boys, even without Freeney. I say that after a bit of a rough start, Manning figures out how to dissect the Saints D, and picks them apart. Final Score: Indy 31, Saints 21.
There is nothing but hate in the town of Baltimore. Even after 26 years, the bile from the fan base continues. When the name "Bob Irsay" is uttered, the bad memories come rushing out as if the Mayflower trucks had pulled out just yesterday. Now that the Colts have beaten the Ravens 20-3 in the divisional playoff game, I doubt that the anger will go away.
In an column in the Baltimore Sun titled "Ravens' Victory Would Be Sweet for Fans, Franchise on Several Levels" written by the aptly named Peter Schmuck, the ghosts of football franchises past are referred to again, and the pain and agony of losing a pretty bad football team who wouldn't win a playoff game for another 11 years is highlighted. Schmuck tells tales about how a Ravens victory would have been the second biggest win in franchise history, first of course being the Super Bowl win 9 years ago. Yes, Baltimore was the home of the Vince Lombardi Trophy before Indianapolis.
One fan replied in prose…
Winning this game will dim that fateful night, when that pig Irsay stole our Colts with out giving us a chance to fight.
Knock that horseshoe off their helmets and compare them no more, to the legend of Johnny U, Berry and Moore.
Our team is ready to hit and tackle, a win would bust that Indy shackle.
The Super Bowl would be nice and great to win, but beating the Indy colts tonight would give it to Irsay, right on the chin.
I guess that fan didn't hear that Bob Irsay has been dead for 14 years.
So I have a few things that I would like to request. In the future when these two teams meet in the playoffs, could we please stop fighting the battle of who could care less.
To football fans in Baltimore: It's been 26 years. Perhaps, you should move on.
To ESPN and the sensational media: Every time the Colts and Ravens play, stop showing the Mayflower Trucks.
To the people who insist on bringing this up every single time these two teams play: Tell the whole story.
The Colts have had a vagabond history. Originally the Dayton Triangles, the team lifted anchor and moved to New York and became the Brooklyn Dodgers in 1930. The team then changed the name to the Brooklyn Tigers. The next year, the Tigers merged with the Boston Yankees. In 1949 the Boston Yankees moved to New York to become the New York Yanks. The team moved again in 1952, this time to Dallas, and became the original Dallas Texans. The Texans moved to Baltimore in 1953, and changed the name to the Colts. So if you're keeping score at home, that's six relocations in the team's 80 years.
The Colts had been threatening to relocate as early as 1971 if they didn't get a new stadium.
Memorial Stadium "featured" non backed bleachers…in the 1980s.
Attendance had been dropping at Memorial Stadium steadily for 7 years.
Baltimore got the Ravens in the same manner Indy got the Colts. Nobody seemed to mind then.
So to the huddled masses in the greater Baltimore area, just stop talking about it. Stop officially referring to the Colts as "The Professional Football Franchise from Indianapolis." Get off your high horse (yes, every pun intended). The people of Cleveland have forgotten that your Ravens are nothing more than the Browns in purple. In fact, both sports franchises in Baltimore originated in other cities (the Baltimore Orioles were once the St. Louis Browns…ironically enough).
Firstly, I'd like to admit that I was wrong. As a long time Colt fan, I started to think that the window had closed on my beloved boys in blue. After, yet again, another devastating playoff loss at San Diego, I started to question if the Colts' era was over. Tony Dungy announced his retirement, and the team waived Marvin Harrison. The team elected to ascend Jim Caldwell as the head coach of the Colts. It sounded like good news to me at first. He had been under Dungy's tutelage for several years and had been long considered the heir apparent.
Then I looked at his résumé. His only head coaching experience was at Wake Forest.
WAKE FOREST!
It would be different if he had rebuilt the program to be a national power and the terror of the ACC. However, he finished 26-63 in eight seasons at Wake, and led the Demon Deacons to only one winning season (7-5 in 1999) and placed no higher than 5th in the ACC. I started to get that queasy feeling that Dolphin fans who knew Big Ten football got when the Fins hired Cam Cameron.
In week one, the Colts lost Anthony Gonzales to a knee injury, Bob Sanders executed his contractually obligated right to have his annual injury, and Indy only beat the Jags 14-12 at home. Only three words crossed my mind that day.
Eight and eight (ok, technically it's only two words).
I realized that the Colts had lost two of their best receivers from the previous year, and the "heart and soul" of the defense was gone. Who was going to step up in the Wide Receiving corps? Rookie Austin Collie or some guy named Pierre Garçon? Pierre Garçon? You mean the guy who was a sixth round draft pick from a D-III school? Yeah, like that was going to happen.
It all seemed lost the next week in Miami. The Colts couldn't stop the Wildcat, and Peyton spent most of his time on the sideline with Tiger Woods. Miami dominated the game, but the score was close near the end of the game. Manning had one last chance to bring the Colts back. On the first play of the drive he threw a short pass to Garçon, his only reception of the game. He ran the ball 43 yards for a touchdown. In that moment, he became my favorite receiver.
Miami showed everyone the apparent blueprint to beat the Colts, and still couldn't put them away. The Colts had the ball for less than 15 minutes, and it was still enough to defeat the defending AFC East Champions on the road.
It occurred to me that the Colts may not be in as much trouble as I thought. Through injury after injury (Marlin Jackson and Sanders both out for the season, and Kelvin Hayden and Gonzales out for extended periods, along with Dwight Freeney and Joseph Addai missing key games), the Colts have beaten every team they have faced. Sure, they haven't looked like world beaters, but they have gutted their way through some tough spots. Out of 11 wins, six of them came after the Colts trailed in the 4th quarter, including the satisfying win over the Pats. They know how to win. They can do it under any circumstance.
Yet every week, they are put on "upset alert". What do they have to do to earn the respect of the "experts"? Win a Super Bowl? Come back from a 31-14 deficit in the 4th quarter against the hated Patriots? The Colts are 11-0, and still each week somebody says the Colts are going down. Nobody pulled this sort of crap when the Pats made their run two years ago; even after they were fortunate to escape Indy with a win (as many say about the Colts' week 10 victory).
True, the Colts haven't been overwhelming in their wins. In the last three games, Peyton has thrown 6 interceptions, yet they still win. So imagine what will happen when he starts playing more like the MVP candidate that he is. The Colts have been going with rookies and deep bench players on the other side of the ball, and they are still undefeated. Now imagine what that D is going to be like with both Freeney and Hayden back.
This week, the Colts will host the Tennessee Titans. True, Tennessee's offense is much different that it was in their October 11th matchup. They carved up three teams that are better in run defense than the Colts by running a similar Wildcat offense that torched the Colts for 109 yards in Miami. However, the Colts will be facing the same defense it saw in week 5 which Manning went 36/44 for 309 yards and three TDs…and that was before Garçon found his grove. And the game is in Indy. I know that the Titans need a win more than the Colts, but that's true for every team that plays Indy.
Two of the four pillars of evil are the New England Patriots and Daylight Saving Time. Both descended onto Indianapolis on Sunday. Coincidence? Hardly.
Well at least one of them was vanquished yesterday. The “Hatriots” came into the game with a 5-2 record, taking on a Colt team that has had an identity crisis throughout the season. The game wasn’t a must win, but was getting to the point that the boys in blue couldn’t take another loss.
Indy’s D turned up big, and Anthony Gonzales’s two TD lets him hold onto his role as the best receiver on the team (enough for me to forgive him for going to “The” Ohio State University…which ironically is the third pillar of evil).
A win over the Hatriots is always fun, but I must admit that this year’s win is not as good as when Tom Brady is playing. Granted, I enjoyed watching Bill Bellacheat outsmart himself (which doesn’t seem to be that hard anymore), but seeing Tom Brady get flustered by the Colts just gives me a tingly feeling in a place I don’t talk about at parties.
Now if we can do the same for Daylight Saving Time, it’ll be a wonderful weekend. I was always proud of the fact Indiana was one of the lone holdouts to resist that idiotic tradition. I believe that DST is nothing more than a conspiracy perpetrated by the owners of golf courses across America.
DST allegedly reduces energy costs, but a study published last year indicated that people use less energy in place that doesn’t observe DST. It turns out that people use exactly one more hour of air conditioning in a DST time zone than in standard time. And where was this study taken? Indiana. That should be more than enough reason to switch back to the way it was. DST is irrelevant now, as we are now a 24 hour society. It’s an outdated concept, like praying to a sun god, saying “dandy”, or casting Rutger Howard as a romantic lead.
All I could do was turn off the television and go to bed during the third quarter of the Colts/Bears game. I had seen enough.
While some have said that I’m premature in hitting the “panic button”, but let’s take a look at the game. If I say something that isn’t correct, let me know.
1. The “Peyton wasn’t Peyton” argument doesn’t fly. Yes, it’s true that he didn’t look like the MVP he was a few years ago, but the last time I counted, there are 11 players on the field—11 players that played like it was their first game back. Reggie Wayne and Anthony Gonzales both dropped several passes that could have turned into big plays.
2. What does the Colts’ offense have in common with the Palin kid? No protection. The Colts have always prided themselves on having one of the top O-Lines in the NFL. But with Jeff Saturday out for the next 5 weeks, and the team still missing Tarik Glenn, Joe Addai couldn’t run well, and Manning didn’t handle the pass rush the way he has in the past. If this doesn’t improve, the Colts will find themselves in a world of hurt.
3. Cover 2? Just cover one—particularly the half back. The defense, which is built on speed, was flat out out-run by a rookie. A ROOKIE! If the D line doesn’t get back in order, Adrian Peterson will run for 7,500 yards next week (which would be a record). Bob Sanders can’t do it alone (especially if the other team is going to throw some championship caliber blocks).
4. Special teams—I need to up my dosage of blood pressure medication before I can talk about it.
In short, it wasn’t just Peyton…it was everyone, and that scares the hell out of me.
On another note, Tom Brady has suffered a season ending injury, or as the elders call it “karma”. Brady’s injury is so huge that the ’72 Dolphins have already opened their Champaign bottles. Why do bad things happen to such a virtuous franchise? The mind reels.
I am an author and freelance writer. I have published a novel titled Radio Radio, written a full length screenplay, four short films and a pilot for a television show. I am a two time Script Frenzy winner and the music columnist for Praxis Magazine. In between cheering for my beloved Indianapolis Colts and playing in online poker tournaments (as IndianaShane on PokerStars), I’m working on my second novel and screenplay (they are the same story). I live in Minneapolis with my very beautiful and extremely cool wife, DeAnna, our two dogs and pet rat.
